Struggles Become Challenges You Welcome

One horrible thing does not define us, what we do with it does. I want no kid in foster care, and no one in general, to be sexually abused, and if I tell my story, maybe I can prevent it from happening to other kids. I was abandoned with strangers, sexually abused for years, and had to maintain my sanity in spite of evil done to me.

I was sexually abused by my two older foster brothers. They made me keep it a secret and said they would kill my baby brother if I didn’t. They would also place roadkill beside me and said if I told anyone, they would make me eat it. When this was all finally revealed, I was sent away from my brother, who was the only sibling that got to stay with me out of us four. I was told I was ugly, stupid, and worthless every day for years, but God often counteracted and said that wasn’t true.

I overcame these things with over 25 years of therapy and studied psychology and people, finally healing through self-love. Once you love yourself, struggles become challenges that you welcome because you know it’s not the end, it’s all a learning experience. I learned that I am resilient and made with divine purpose, and that no one can put me down or stop me from embracing my greatness because I am God’s child.

Some influential and supportive people in my life are a nun named sister Lillian Massi, who was the first to give up her worldly goods to help others, and my second foster mom, a strong African American woman who grew up in the Jim Crow era but never allowed prejudice and taught me to help others in need and focus less on me. When no one wanted my brother and I, she rescued us and gave us tools to survive the world without family. I’ve also been influenced by my childhood friends, my community, my ancestors, and other people who have survived odds such as Mother Teresa, Nelson Mandela, Eartha Kitt, and Anne Frank.

In spite of all that’s happened in my life, I would describe myself as a warrior because I always bounce back and fight hard to stay happy, resilient, and grateful that my mom birthed me. I praise God every day that I can be here and get a new chance every day I wake.